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  1. Some Kind of Weird Purgatory

    April 28, 2012 by Sally

    I drove to Indiana yesterday on a whim. Sitting in my apartment back in Raleigh just didn’t feel right. “What am I doing here?”

    I packed up Dozer and headed to Indiana at 5:45am yesterday. He freaked out the whole time, and my back was bothering me, so it wasn’t exactly the best trip. It felt the longest of any of the trips I’ve ever made. Being back in Indiana felt nice…but still weird. “What am I doing here?”

    I feel like I’m in some kind of weird purgatory…stuck between two lives, two places, two realities…and not sure how to get out of it. There are intense moments of sadness and fear, and then moments of hope and happiness. At the end of the day, all I can do is hope this turns out okay…but there is absolutely no guarantee that the next 3 months won’t suck. How do you hope for the best while preparing for the worst? That’s such an oxymoron.

    The job search is going okay. I’m hoping my second interview with a potential company goes well, because the overall attitude of the people who work there is overwhelmingly positive and encouraging. And…the VP is a woman, which I love. While the clock is ticking and the bank account is slowly drying up, I feel like I owe it to myself to kinda take my time with the job search. I want to really really love the next place I work, and I want to be there for a long time. Here’s to hoping I find that quickly.

    Overall, I’m feeling okay. I get to go to my sister’s birthday party at my mom and dad’s house, which is something I haven’t done in a year. I also get to sleep over with my sister…something I haven’t done since Christmas. It really does feel good to be back home, now if only the other pieces would start falling into place.

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  2. It’s All Over Now, You Can Rest

    April 26, 2012 by Sally

    I can't wait to see these faces again.

    I got home from the gym last night absolutely exhausted. It wasn’t “I just worked out so I’m exhausted”, it was pure mental and physical exhaustion. After eating dinner at 7:30pm, I couldn’t resist it any longer. “I’ll just take a nap,” I thought.

    As I laid down to sleep, my boyfriend called me on Facetime. “I’m going to take a cat nap,” I assured him, “and I’ll call you back in like an hour.”

    That hour turned into 14. Plain and simple, I was tired. Exhausted. For the past two years, I’ve always had trouble falling asleep. Feeling the natural urge to sleep was something I hadn’t experienced in a long time, but I embraced it last night and my body proved to me how much it just needed to just rest. It was almost as if I was sleeping off an entire year of heartache, loneliness, and struggle. “It’s all over now, you can rest.”

    I came to North Carolina with eyes wide open and ready to take on a new adventure. The reality couldn’t have been more different. Some weeks were exciting, fun filled, and made me glad that I had made the move, but many were lonely and left me longing for home. I did my best to adjust to my new life, but something just didn’t feel right. “Hadn’t this been what I wanted?”

    Can't Wait to Spend Weekends with This Girl

    I left my job this week. That chapter of my life has closed, and now I’m left to sink or swim. Everyone always says, “Everything happens for a reason,” but the journey to the “reason” isn’t easy, and it’s often littered with fear and doubt. However, the downpour of support and love that I have experienced from family and friends back home has made the start of my journey a little easier. I pray every day that it continues to be a smooth transition and that I find a new job quickly. I’m ready to come home to the people who love me.

    It’s all over now, and I can rest. I have put the past year behind me and my eyes are focused on the future, and what that holds for me. I’ve had two interviews so far, so I’m optimistic that I’ll be employed shortly. I do my best to keep my thoughts optimistic, knowing that what you put out to the universe is bound to come to fruition (The Secret).

    For now, I’m going to embrace the free time I have. I’m going to go to the Farmer’s Market, read, blog, lay out, and walk Dozer everyday. I’m going to do everything I can to make sure my journey to the next phase of my life isn’t litter with fear and doubt, but instead is litter with lessons learned and love.

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  3. Growing Up and Getting Older

    March 10, 2012 by Sally

    When you’re 16, you begin to dream about the life you hope to have as you approach adulthood. You think about the type of person you’re going to marry, the career you’re going to have, and all of the amazing things you are going to do when you’re older. What you can’t possibly fathom or plan for is the moment when you are living those moments you only dreamed about and realize that it’s not quite what you expected at all.

    As I approach 28, I’ve been thinking a lot about the life I thought I would have at this point in my life. Children, a husband, and an amazing career were all things I thought I would have at 28, and, yet, I don’t (except for the amazing career). At 16, I imagined that all adults had things like family, careers, and marriages because they were ready for them. I’ve learned many have them because it just seemed like the next logical step, and it had nothing to do with being ready or mature enough. At 16, 30 seemed so old and so mature. Surely by 30 I would have life all figured out and life would be easier to navigate without my parents, school, or bullying peers to stand in my way or cast doubts on my decisions or who I was. 28 doesn’t feel like that at all. Who knew that at 28 I would often feel the same as I did at 16. I still deal with insecurities, loneliness, comparing myself to my peers, and a sense of “what the hell am I supposed to do now?”

    Facebook has become a source of fear for me these days as I see status updates about marriages, babies, and big changes. Am I doing this wrong? Or am I doing this exactly right, and everyone else is just following a drummer that I just can’t hear yet? As you get older you begin to realize that time is finite. Time goes too fast, and it gives you this sense of urgency to hurry up and figure it all out…but then you realize how young and immature you actually feel. Not wanting or not having the things that society tells you are supposed to want and have at any point in your life can be terrifying. Wanting them and not having them is even worse.

    What I’m hoping is that I’ll look back on these day with the same nostalgia that I have for my teen years. I’m hoping that I can embrace the chaos of my late twenties, and let them lead to the life I am meant to have. I hope I can stop comparing my life to lives to those around me, which often causes fear and doubt in my decisions. I don’t want to make decisions because I feel the pressure from an invisible clock that “tick-tocks”…I want to just let life happen, and not rush it.

    Never in a thousand years did I think I would be this old, and still growing up…

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  4. Oh, My Back!

    March 4, 2012 by Sally

    I’ve always considered myself a pretty healthy person. While my weight has always been a struggle for me, I’ve always monitored my blood pressure and managed to keep that under control. I eat extremely healthy Monday-Fri, drink close to a gallon of water a day, take a multi-vitamin daily, and I try to get at least 30 minutes of exercise 3-4 days a week. So, when my back started to ache 3 weeks ago, I figured I had just pulled a muscle and it would get better on its own. Much to my dismay, it only got worse. I couldn’t bend over, and getting up out of a chair or sitting down was extremely painful. I finally went to an orthopedic doctor, where he prescribed physical therapy to strengthen my back muscles and pain killers to ease the pain. I can’t tell you how sad I am that my body is obviously under so much physical stress, that it’s shouting “WE NEED A CHANGE!”

    I was a server and then worked in retail on my feet 8-10 hours a day when I first graduated college, and while being on my feet all day seemed like torture, I have to admit that my desk jobs have done way more damage to my body. Since working desk jobs, my weight is harder to maintain, I suffer numbness in my hands, and clearly, my back muscles and abdominal muscles are suffering atrophy. Take a look at this interesting infographic that details the damage a desk job can do to your health.

    Work Is Murder
    Created by: Online University

    So, what can you do to prevent this? What changes do I plan on making?

    Well, for starters, I’m going to start working out more and adding weights to my workouts. I’m also going to get up and walk and stretch at least twice during my work day. Hopefully all these little changes help. I’m much too young to feel this damn old!

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  5. 10 Year High School Reunion

    February 27, 2012 by Sally

    I just got my “unofficial” Facebook invite to my 10 year high school reunion on June 23rd, 2012. Wow. 10 years goes really fast, and nothing makes that fact hit home like an invitation to your 10 year high school reunion.

    Responses posted on the Rochester High School Class of 2002 10 Year High School Reunion page have been mixed. Some can’t make it, some don’t want to make it, and others are really excited. I’m not sure where I fall into the mix of things, because, well…high school was a very interesting time for me.

    You guessed it! My senior prom!

    My family moved to Rochester when I was 16, which was smack dab in the middle of my high school career. I left friends in Virginia I had known since I was in pre-school, and started a new life as the “new girl” at Rochester High School my junior year. I went from a school of 2,000 students in Virginia, where I was basically just a number amongst a sea of students, to a school of about 450 where I had to verify with my mom that I wasn’t related to the guy that asked me out at lunch. Although moving in the middle of your high school career can seem like the most tragic thing EVER for a 16 year old, it was probably the best time of my life.

    I assimilated into small town life pretty quickly. At 16, I can’t imagine any better way to spend my youth than all the shenanigans my friends and I got into in a small town surrounded by corn fields. I remember often thinking during our wild weekends that our lives were something out of a movie, and looking back on those days, I realize how unique and precious they really were. I wouldn’t change that time for anything in the world.

    Part of me wants to always remember those people and those times the way they are ingrained in my memory. Reuniting with my classmates from 10 years ago will only reinforce the fact that everything and everyone changes, and the only constant in life is change. Reuniting with my high school class from 10 years ago will surely remind me that I really am almost 30 and I am only getting older. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock…times goes too fast.

    I will say that I am very proud of what I have accomplished in my 10 years since graduating from high school. Sure, I never lost the freshman 15 from college, nor am I married with children…but I am successful and proud of my career, and that’s what I had my sights set on when I was 18. From what I can see on Facebook, the classmates I’ve connected with there are successful in lots of ways, too. Beautiful children, families, and awesome careers. We all did pretty good for ourselves.

    I’m sure when the “official” invite comes in the snail mail, I will RSVP “yes”…but I can’t lie…I’m pretty nervous about seeing faces I haven’t seen in 10 years.

    Have you attended a 10 year high school reunion lately? What was the experience like for you? Click here to share your high school reunion experience in the comments!

     

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  6. Valentines Day

    February 14, 2012 by Sally

    valentinesday

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  7. Do It Anyway

    February 12, 2012 by Sally

    bird

    People are often unreasonable, illogical,
    And self-centered;
    Forgive them anyway.

    If you are kind, people may accuse you
    Of selfish, ulterior motives;
    Be kind anyway.

    If you are successful, you will win some
    False friends and some true enemies;
    Succeed anyway.

    If you are honest and frank;
    People may cheat you;
    Be honest and frank anyway.

    What you spend years building,
    someone could destroy overnight;
    Build anyway.

    If you find serenity and happiness,
    they may be jealous;
    Be happy anyway.

    The good you do today,
    people will often forget tomorrow;
    Do good anyway.

    Give the world the best you have,
    and it may never be enough;
    Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

    You see, in the final analysis
    it is between you and God
    It was never between you and them anyway.

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  8. Homesick

    February 12, 2012 by Sally

    DSC00779

    It was about this time last year that I was starting to get the urge to pick up and go somewhere completely different. I wanted the chance to get out and be on my own…really on my own. I wanted a new city, a new job, and new friends. Here I sit almost a year later, and I’ve accomplished everything I set out to do almost 12 months ago. I am happy and very proud of myself for taking very scary steps to create a life I could feel satisfied with.

    I’ll be the first to admit that it’s not always amazing, and every once in awhile, I will have one of those weekends when I just wish I could hop into my car and drive 2 hours and be “home.” This weekend was one of those weekends.

    I was so homesick this weekend. I felt like I did when I was 8 years old and went away to summer camp and laid in my bunk and cried myself to sleep for the first 3 nights. It came out of no where, and I really have no idea why it was this weekend. Maybe it’s because it’s the beginning of “birthday season” for my family (we have 7 birthday from Feb-May in my immediate family), or maybe it’s because Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and I’m feeling especially “alone” with Blake 600 miles away. Whatever the reason, I didn’t like the funk and tried all weekend to get out of it. I tried to occupy my time by:

    • painting and reupholstering my last dining room chair (I’ll be publishing the How-To soon!) Check out the finished product below!
    • making chicken vegetable soup
    • working out and taking Dozer on lots of walk
    • drinking wine (I don’t recommend this, as it resulted in a teary-eyed 12am phone call to my boyfriend)
    • thrift store shopping (got a really fun find! See below!)
    • Target shopping
    • taking Dozer to the dog park twice and giving him a bath once
    • watching new movies! Something Borrowed was ADORABLE!
    • looking for new fun things to do in Raleigh!

    The last thing proved to be the most useful. I found two groups on MeetUp.com that look like a lot of fun, so I signed up for two events next week. One is a Valentine’s Day Meetup at the shooting range. I’m really excited for this because I have always wanted to shoot a handgun! I’m looking forward to meeting some new people in Raleigh and getting to take out some aggression!

    It’s hard when the weather gets cold to stay busy and keep myself occupied, but I’m determined to make more of an effort to spend less time alone and more time out and about! Check out the pictures below of my final chair and my fun thrift store find!

    On a completely unrelated note, despite my previous obsession with whipped cream vodka, I will never drink it again. Turns out, it has almost 200 in one shot. Holy unnecessary calories.

     

    Have you ever felt homesick? Do you currently live far away from the rest of your family? How do you cope? Click here to share your advice on dealing with homesickness in the comments!

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    I’ve seen a lot of lanterns in Target and Pier One as decorative pieces, so as I was browsing through Goodwill this weekend, I was on the lookout for one to use as a center piece on my kitchen table. My last Goodwill store, I found one! I loved the shabby chic clouded floral sides, and they are glass lined, so you can burn a candle in the lantern. It was only $3…compared to the $20-$30 lanterns in Target and Pier One, I’d say I did a great job. Also, white vases, much like the one you see a few posts below, are all over the place. Mine was only $4 at Goodwill and way cuter than the ones I have seen in stores. I freaking LOVE Goodwill! :)

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    The before and after of my 2nd hand chairs! I paid $10 a chair, plus about $5 in painting supplies.

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  9. Quick 5 Minute Breakfast Sandwich

    February 5, 2012 by Sally

    5 minute Egg Sandwich

    Eating breakfast is really important, but if you’re like me, adjusting your wake up time 20 minutes can be easier said than done. About a year ago, when I was living with my little sister, she taught me a really cool trick for cooking eggs that makes them the perfect shape to slap between two pieces of toast. It’s a quick, easy way to make a portable egg sandwich that is packed with protein.

    5 Minute Breakfast Sandwich
    You’ll need the following:

    • 2 eggs
    • 1 tablespoon of skim milk
    • 1 piece of cheese (I like colby jack or cheddar)
    • 2 pieces of bread
    • 1 microwaveable cereal bowl

    Instructions:

    • Put two pieces of bread in the toaster, and put down.
    • Whip eggs and milk in microwaveable cereal bowl.
    • Put bowl with whipped eggs and milk into microwave for 2 minutes. The eggs will expand, and appear to like they may blow up. Don’t worry, they aren’t going to explode.
    • After toast pops up, put cheese on one piece of toast.
    • Once eggs are done, take bowl out of microwave, wait for eggs to deflate a little bit, and then put egg (which will be in a perfect round shape!), onto the other piece of toast.
    • Combine both pieces of toast, and voila!

    Nutritional Information

    Keep in mind that this can change depending on what type of bread you use and what kind of cheese you use. I use 9 grain bread and full fat colby cheese, because I try to make my breakfast the most calorie and fat dense meal of the day. You can easily reduce the calorie and fat of this sandwich by substituting low cal bread, using just egg whites, or taking off the cheese.

    Calories: 455

    Fat: 20g

    Fiber: 6g

    Protein: 27g

    Tell me what you think! Click here to add your comments!

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  10. North Carolina Drivers

    February 3, 2012 by Sally

    roadrage72_7

    If you’re planning a move to North Carolina, there are some things you’re going to have to adjust to. You’ll have to learn to deal with miserably humid July and August, you’ll have to figure out how to navigate a completely new place, and last, but not least, you’ll have to change the way you drive. That’s right, North Carolina drivers drive unlike any other people I have ever experienced, and if you want to keep up with them on the road, you’re going to have to drive like they do. The following are 8 new driving habits you will need to pick up in order to assimilate onto the roadways with the rest of North Carolina’s drivers.

    Two Lane Highway Etiquette

    In North Carolina, the left lane is not for faster traffic, and the right for slower moving traffic. Just pick whichever lane makes ya feel all good inside.

    Passing on the right is not frowned upon AT ALL in North Carolina. I mean, how else are you supposed to get around the slow moving car in the left lane? If you just moved into the left lane to pass a slower car in the right, don’t worry about that quickly approaching car in your rear view mirror. They will pass you on the right way prematurely, and not give you 5 second to get back into the right lane.

    Swerving and weaving is an art form here in North Carolina. Master it, and don’t be surprised when the person behind you rides your ass until they can bolt around you barely missing your bumper. (And no, this habit doesn’t correlate to the number of fender benders on 40 and 440)

    It’s completely acceptable to ride someone’s ass, pass them on the left, and then match their speed exactly for miles. Remain parallel with them, even if a line of cars piles up behind you due to the fact that the passing lane (we’re talking about the legal passing lane, which is usually the left in most states…but not NC!), is blocked.

    Rules of the Road

    Don’t use your headlights in the rain.

    There is no such thing as doing the normal “5 over the speed limit”. You need to be going 5 under or 15 over. There is no happy medium.

    Turn signals are completely optional in all circumstance. Actually, you know what, just don’t even bother using them at all.

    Roll through all stop signs, especially at 4 way stops, with no regard to legal traffic laws. However, always be sure to make a complete stop at an intersection when you are the thru traffic that does not have a stop sign, and then wait for the person with the actual stop sign to go. Then, it’s always appropriate to look at the person actually regarding traffic laws like they’re crazy.

    Live in North Carolina and you agree or disagree? Did I miss one? Click here to add them in the comments.

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